What may it feel or be like?
When you begin thinking about recovery from an eating disorder, it’s completely normal to experience a wide range of emotions – many of them conflicting. You might feel:
- Guilt
- Shame
- Anger
- Fear
- Exhaustion
- Grief
Feeling uncertain or ambivalent about recovery is incredibly common. In fact, it’s almost instinctual. For many, an eating disorder has functioned as an unhealthy coping mechanism to manage overwhelming emotions or life challenges. So even though it causes harm, the idea of letting it go can feel threatening – like giving up something that once felt safe or familiar. This internal conflict is normal. One part of you may want to hold on to the eating disorder, while another part longs for freedom, healing and a fuller life.
All of these emotions are part of the recovery cycle, and acknowledging them is a vital step forward.
Reaching out for help and expressing these feelings to someone you trust can make a big difference. Being heard and understood supports emotional processing, self-acceptance, and validation – all of which help build hope for recovery.
All these confusing emotions are very normal and are part of the recovery cycle.
While the recovery journey is personal and looks different for everyone, many people who’ve recovered from eating disorders report similar positive outcomes – such as developing stronger relationships, reclaiming their identity, rediscovering joy, and finding meaning in life beyond the eating disorder.
What you can do for yourself: Self-Help and Self-Care Strategies
Learn healthier ways to cope with emotional pain or stress
Recovery from an eating disorder is about more than just stopping harmful eating behaviours – it’s also about developing new, healthier ways to manage emotional distress and building a sense of identity that isn’t tied to food, weight, or appearance.
Here are some healthier coping strategies you can try when you’re feeling overwhelmed:
- Talk it through with a trusted individual
- Journal about it
- Listen to music
- Engage in a creative activity (e.g., painting)
- Play with a pet
- Read a good book
- Take a walk outside
- Play a favourite game
- Do something helpful for someone else
It’s important to remember that it’s not healthy to pretend as if you are not feeling anything when you are. Allow yourself to feel them fully. You have every right to express your emotions, and nobody should shame or invalidate you for doing so. Rather than using food as a way to cope, practice reaching out and leaning on the people who care about you during difficult times.
Develop a balanced relationship with food
Let go of rigid eating rules that you have been linking to your self-worth - what you eat and how you eat does not determine your value at all. With that said, it can be helpful to have some sort of flexible and broad guideline to eating, like having regular moderate-sized meals throughout the day.
Example (Keep in mind that one serving is about the size of your clenched fist)
Breakfast
- Toast with scrambled egg
- Cup of soy milk
- One serving of fruit (e.g., banana, orange, apple, strawberries)
Lunch
- Chicken salad sandwich
Dinner
- One serving of rice with salmon and stir fried vegetables
- One serving of fruit
Snacks
- Yogurt with muesli and chopped up fruit
- Mixed nuts
- Healthy alternatives to traditional desserts like homemade banana ice cream and oatmeal cookies
Learning to listen to your body’s natural signs is important, especially when it tells you that you’re hungry or full. Tuning into these cues means eating when you feel hungry and stopping when you feel satisfied, rather than relying on rigid rules or external expectations.
By honouring your hunger and fullness, you’re giving your body the care and respect it deserves. Over time this practice can help reduce the stress and preoccupation around food, allowing eating to become a more intuitive, nourishing, and enjoyable part of your day – rather than something driven by fear or control.
Learn to embrace yourself as you are
This can be easier said than done – but with small, consistent steps, you can develop a more compassionate relationship with yourself. Here are some suggestions to help you along the way:
- Make a list of your positive qualities and place it somewhere visible, like on the wall near your desk or bed. If you’re struggling to come up with items, ask a trusted friend, family member, or teacher to help you. This could also open up a meaningful conversation about self-appreciation and self-respect. Everyone has strengths – it’s just a matter of discovering and nurturing them.
- Build your sense of identity by focusing on your unique strengths and qualities. This can boost resilience and help you feel more grounded and confident in who you are.
- Address body checking and avoidance behaviors
- Avoid “fat-talk” and appearance-based judgements – both about yourself and others. These conversations reinforce unrealistic ideals and harm self-esteem.
- Challenge negative self talk. When you catch yourself being self-critical or pessimistic, ask:
- “What evidence do I have to support this thought?”
- “What’s the evidence against it?”
- Dress for yourself – not based on what you fear others might think. Choose clothes that make you feel comfortable and confident in your own skin.
- Notice when you’re comparing yourself to others – especially on social media. Even People without eating disorders often experience anxiety and self-doubt when they compare themselves to others online. Consider
- Creating healthier media habits
- Taking a break from social media
- Even if you’re aware that photos are often edited or filtered, they can still trigger insecurity. A break may give you space to heal and rebuild your self-worth away from constant comparison.
- Pamper your body. Treat your body with care and kindness – whether through a massage, warm candlelit bath, skincare routine, or wearing a scent you enjoy. These small acts of self-care remind you that your body is something to value, not punish.
